“You can let it rule you, or you can rule it”

I said this line to my good friend last night during a wonderful catch-up conversation. She liked it. It resonated with her.

This quote has probably been said by someone before. If not, the concept is definitely not new. It can be related to almost anything, but I was using it to describe how we can either let our past rule us, or we rule it.

I’m someone who has let the past rule me. I let it rule me for almost 25 years. At age 25, after an 8-week mindfulness course, I decided no more.

Yet, this expression can be related to anything. Friends. Fear. Money. Jealousy. Sadness. Work. Stress. You name it, anything can lord over you, if you let it.

It’s important to remember that you’re in the driver’s seat. You make the last call. It’s up to you what and how you decide to do, respond, act, say. Not your partner. Not your mother-in-law. Not your friend. Not your boss. You and only you are in charge of you.

So why do we often let something or someone rule over us? I’m not sure. Perhaps it’s habit. Perhaps it’s a form of masochism. Perhaps we don’t think we’re deserving of freedom from the tyranny of our own thoughts. I honestly don’t know.

Whatever the reason, it needs to stop. The more something consumes you, the more it can take from you. The real you can get lost. Getting lost is not advised as finding yourself can take much painstaking time. So don’t lose yourself. Don’t let whatever it is continue to rule you. Break free.

Perhaps it’s worrying about what others think and not wanting to upset the apple cart. Perhaps it’s wanting to be everything to everyone. Perhaps it’s wanting to live the “perfect” life (whatever that is). Perhaps it’s wanting to be the expert when you’re still figuring it all out (hmmm, a little self-reflection here…not sure I’ll ever have it all figured out).

Whatever it is, leave it behind. Move forward. Stop. Turn whatever it is on its head and rule it.

Happy Ruling.




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